Caution!
May contain swears, slang, dark humour, graphic pictures, nudity, sexual references, drug references, and anything else that can be considered offensive.
Seriously.

Sunday, February 27, 2011

Hey, Mom? I just wanted to say Thank You

So I have spent the last week or so watching episodes of "NBC's Dateline : To Catch a Predator".  Oh my god. It's amazing!

Now, being a Mom, I obviously have strong feelings about things of this nature - Potential predators taking advantage of young teens. I mean, how would you feel if it was your child? Well, how about you ask my Mother.

I was a stupid teenager. Honestly, you have no idea. I was a Mom's worst nightmare.
Track record:
Skipped school

Smoked cigarettes regularly
Smoked pot regularly
Tried other drugs (not regularly)
Drank
Hung out with strangers
Had sex
Said terrible, disgusting and very rude things to my Mother
Etc, etc...


Kinda like this, but with less money


My poor Mother didn't know what to do with me. She tried so hard to keep a close eye on me, hoping to keep me from harm. Unfortunately, I only saw her trying to keep me from 'having a good time'. Things look very different from that side - the side of a naive, defiant teenager. Let's talk about one of the first times my Mother saved me from danger.


When I was 13, I was a church going child. I had the opportunity to go on a trip with two other girls from my church (One was an adult, the other my age) to some type of a churchy gathering in Victoria, BC (About 10 hours away from where we lived). It would be the first time that I was away from the watchful eye of my Mother. I was already very much into boys, but due to the less than esthetically pleasing placement of my teeth, I had very little confidence. Until I met Kyle*.
Kyle was 21, a Youth Pastor and gorgeous - and I do mean gorgeous. Oldest of three children, he came across as big brotherly, smart and confident. We became 'friends' and got to know each other over the few days that I was there. He ended up telling me that he was not the confident man that I perceived him as. Oh no, he thought he was ugly, and girls didn't like him. He had 'never had a girlfriend' because they always told him he was 'a nerd'. Of course, I fell for it - and him. We went for 'walks' alone, with him telling the others at the gathering that it was to talk about God and such things. In actuality, we spoke about love, loneliness and being together one day. Before I went home, he gave me his email address to keep in touch with him. I went home and we began chatting online almost every day. He told me that he missed me, that he wanted to hold me, love me. I was obsessed with him. Not only that, but this guy - this man - was in love with me! With me! It was a secret affair, and I felt special. We called each other a few nights a week. I was madly in love.

Yeah, then Mom found out about all this. 

The phone bill tipped her off (It was probably horrendous). She called around and found out about Kyle. She was livid. She told me that it was inappropriate and that 'he should know better'. She refused to let me near the computer or the phone. I hated her. She was taking away the 'only great thing in my life' and she was doing it because she was a 'terrible Mother'.
Mom, thank you. THANK YOU.


Unfortunately, my memory is hazy, but this example will have to do. He told me once that I reminded him of a girl from a TV show that he watched in the mid 90's. All I remember is that she had red hair (mine was dyed red at the time) and massive boobs. I don't even think I wore a bra yet. Anyway, it was kind of like this. 


Me, twelve. Christina Hendricks, 38-DDD


Of course, I took it as a compliment. My Mother, on the other hand, saw it for what it really was - saw him for what he really was. A disgusting pervert that was preying on a young girl. HER young girl.
I'm not sure exactly what she did, but I do know that he lost his job - and the right to have any job that let him have 'alone' time with children.
I hated my Mother... I remember being so upset with her... and she took it. She took the blame, the hate, the rage - She let me take it all out on her. I will never, ever forget that. 


It's so hard for me to see some of the young girls that I know go through the same thing. Unfortunately, I'm not close enough to them to have chat logs or proof of any inappropriate behaviour. All I can do is tell them my story, and hope that they see it for themselves. One day, my kids will have access to the internet... and I'm hoping I can be as strong as my Mother and monitor the shit out of them.






*Name has been changed to protect the sicko's identity.


------------------------------------------------------------------


UPDATE!
Check out this website to keep your kids safe! It was promoted on NBC's Dateline to help you keep tabs on your child - and keep them safe from potential predators.

Thursday, February 24, 2011

Seriously?!

I mentioned before that I work at the local arena that hosts the concerts in town. I have a letter for the patrons. *ahem*

Dear patrons,

If you have floor tickets, then you sit in the floor area. When you LEAVE the floor area, please take your ticket with you - I WILL be asking you for it again.
No, I haven't forgotten you - You tripped over my shoe and gave me a big drunk hug with a very loud "sorry" that you attempted to whisper into my ear.

The reason I'm asking to see your ticket is so that I know you haven't gone and given it to someone that only paid for stand tickets and is too cheap to get floor seats so that you can both be on the floor. I'm not stupid.
These excuses are wearing thin:
"I know where my seat is." - GOOD FOR YOU! Most people don't, so I'm really happy for you. The thing is that I didn't ask you if you knew where your seat was. I still need to see your ticket.

"I'm with _____" (Usually points at someone that just walked ahead) - I'm really proud that you managed to find someone that can tolerate you in your disgusting, drunken state! I still need to see your ticket.
"I left it with my husband; he's sitting right there." - I'm sorry, are we still in the 50s? Jesus, lady, put some big girl panties on! Carry your own ticket! 
"I don't have floor tickets... but I really like (Insert band/artist name here)!" Really? You really like them? Then why did you not pay the extra 15 or so dollars for floor tickets?! LIAR.


Sincerely,
Me


-------------


Oh, there's more.


Dear drunk patrons,


Here are the answers to your questions. I think that point form will work better in this situation.


- No, I don't work for the band/artist; I work for the building. I can't introduce you.
- No, I don't think you're cute; I think you're disgusting and you smell like stale beer.
- No, I am not carrying a concealed weapon; I'm not a cop.
- No, I do not have a stick up my ass; Sit down and shut up - You're annoying the people around you with your public drunkenness.
- No, my radio does not play music; It's for communicating to my coworkers.
- No, I don't have any pot; They took yours away for a reason.
- No, I don't want to meet up with you at Denny's after my shift to 'buy you a burger'; .... Wtf?
- Yes! I am married, and that is why I have this ring on. 
- Yes! I'm aware that there is music being played. You don't have to ask me if "I'm hearing this".
- Yes! I do get paid to do this. This is my job.

MOST sincerely,
Me

Monday, February 21, 2011

Ugh, WEIGHT.

Okay, let's be honest here. I'm a bit of a chubbo . I'll totally admit it. I can't blame my kids, but they totally helped me along.

This isn't actually me, for the record.


I've been taking the necessary steps to start getting back in shape. I'm going to tell you what I've been doing, because... well, you're reading my frickin' blog, so I can write about whatever the hell I choose, okay?!

No more white bread - This was really hard for me, at first. I LOVE white bread. It's sooo soft, and makes a damn good PB&J. Unfortunately, white bread isn't good for you, which brings me to my next -very much related- point...

Whole wheat/grains only - Bread, pasta, crackers... I don't believe in totally cutting things out of your diet. I think that moderation is key. If you're going to have pasta, make it whole wheat pasta! AND it fills you up more, so you don't over-eat!
 
More fruit and veggies* - This is not just for losing weight, obviously, but for just being healthy in general. There are very few vegetables and fruits that I don't like... but I never seem to buy them. I always have bananas and apples on hand for my kids, but nothing for myself. Of course I don't want to eat the kids food, so I don't have any. Poo! I'm proud to say that after I put away my groceries from my last shopping trip, I had tomatoes, apples, bananas, celery, carrots and an avocado! Yay!





Avocado and cream cheese sandwich - TRY IT!

 
Low-fat/sodium/non-hydrogenated alternatives - Now, be warned, I am not a scientist. I am not a nutritionist, nor am I really all that smart in general. I understand that some things will say "Low fat" but are still not very good for you. These are the 'alternatives' that I buy. "Calorie Wise" Miracle Whip, non-hydrogenated margarine & low fat sour cream. Am I totally right? Maybe not. I don't know.
 
Alternatives in general - Ice cream? Sooo not great for you. Ever had sorbet? AMAZING! You can have similar 'treats', just make them a healthier choice! Craving popcorn? Get light rather than buttery (It's hard... trust me!). If I really want chocolate, I have a stash of chocolate covered raisins, so at least I'm getting something healthy in there! Or go for super dark chocolate! If I want something sweet, I'll stock up on dried cranberries! YUM. 
 
Exercise! - I can't afford/don't have time to go to the gym, really. I think people confuse doing rigorous work outs with simple exercise. Walking/jogging is very effective in weight loss, and it doesn't require you to either a) pay a gym to get your fat ass on the treadmill or b) become a big, huge sweaty mess. A simple 30 minute walk almost every day is not only really healthy, but it feels great! I've been trying to walk more (It's super icy in my city right now, but I have braved it a couple of times!), and I'm so excited for spring!

hahahahaha, I just really wanted to use this.


Please don't read this and think that you can follow this and lose weight. It doesn't work like that. I'm still a chubbo. I still cheat, eat pizza, laze around and gain weight. I'm just trying to give examples of small things that I do to try to keep myself a little healthier! Also, if you have any input, PLEASE leave a comment! (Unless it's a rude comment - Don't do that!)





*Sorry, Kathryn!!!


Friday, February 18, 2011

This takes me back!

Wow, someone has been slacking! 
After my last post about high school, it got me thinking. I've decided to go back to school! How exciting!

And terrifying. Because I was a stupid and lazy teenager, I have to upgrade some high school courses before I can attend college. No big deal, right? WRONG. I have to do Math and Chemistry, two of the scariest things ever.


Sums it up.
Luckily, I have a great support system, and a ton of friends that are 'mathematically inclined'. 
I encourage all of my Mom/Dad friends to go back to school when you can. Don't ever feel like you've been out for too long, or that you just can't do it. Do it for your kids. When they're older, and they see the effort that you put in, they'll realize that they too can do anything they set their minds to!


All to my friends that aren't Moms or Dads, but high school/college drop outs - It's not too late! There is no shame in trying again. You are in a different place in your life now! Make a change! There are lots of ways to get help for returning to school. 
If you're in PG, you can check out Jump On Board, or go to Continuing Education at the old John McInnis building.
If you aren't in PG, use the internet to find resources in your town. Check your local college, or go back to your old high school and ask the counselors for information!

Thursday, February 17, 2011

Word.

I am audibly sighing as I start this - no joke.

I work at my local 'civic centre' where concerts are held. I like my job - a whole bunch.
I don't necessarily like the music I have to listen to some nights - and it can get very loud - but I love the people! I may not enjoy that country music blaring from the speakers, but when a young cowgirl comes up to me and hugs me saying "This is AWESOME!!!!" I feel... happy! I love these patrons!


I had the... honour of working my first "rap" show a few weeks ago. The band is called D12. I know nothing about them, nor do I care, so here's a link. 
D is for D-Bag


Now I don't want to make anyone angry, so I'll avoid making fun of the music itself. It wasn't truly terrible, as much as I hate to say that. No, the music I could handle... It was the 'gangstas'. 
You know what I'm talking about.


How to Spot a Gangta 101


I'm not very old, but I swear this whole thing was cool about 10 years ago... As in, it should be gone by now. Nothing should last this long - I don't understand why it's still cool. Some men make fun of women for wearing high heels because they don't understand how we can actually walk in them; Seriously, how the hell do you walk like this? Also, why are you even wearing a belt? Does it really help?!

-end rant-



Monday, February 14, 2011

Pregnancy = High School

PLEASE NOTE: You may not agree with this. My high school life was probably very different than yours, but that doesn't mean you can get all uppity. So shut up and read.

I had a brief conversation with an acquaintance a friend today (Yes, Jenn. I've upgraded you) about her pregnancy. Without really thinking too much into it, I mentioned that pregnancy is like high school, and then realized... Damn, I'm right! It really is like high school

First Trimester = 8th/9th Grade

School: Remember being 13 years old and repeating that 'funny line' from that 'funny movie' with your friends every day?

Pregnancy: You laugh... about everything. It doesn't have to be really funny; it doesn't even have to be recent. It's hilarious, period. That movie that you just watched? Funniest movie ever.
Pregnancy: You cry... about everything. Suddenly, the fact that you broke the yolk when trying to make over easy eggs becomes heartbreaking. 
School: Heartbreaking, like when you went to the school dance in 9th grade, and the boy that you like - You know, the one you stare at but have never spoken to - didn't ask you to dance...
BUT WAIT!
"I Wanna Be Bad" by Willa Ford comes on, and you're laughing with your friends again because - what, why am I happy? Why was I sad?! I don't know...







Second Trimester = 10th/11th Grade

School: Do you remember when you realized that your grades were actually kind of important, and you started to smarten up? You start trying to decide what you want to do after you graduate and become a 'grown up'. You are beginning to love yourself for who you are and be comfortable in your skin.
Pregnancy: You're now starting to get more comfortable - just in general. If your pregnancy was unplanned, most the shock has worn off. Hopefully your morning sickness has too! You understand most of the things that you're going through, and are getting ready for the things to come. Life is starting to get much more serious...




You also eat a bunch of crap.
Third Trimester = 12th Grade

School: You're starting to stress a bit. 9 months seemed like a ton of time... All of a sudden you're a few weeks away, and you don't feel ready. If you do feel ready, you also feel sad; A very important part of your life is coming to an end, and the thought is unnerving. You know that something greater is on the other side, but it's that fear of the unknown gnawing at you.
Pregnancy: See above!


Graduation!


Okay, it's not ALWAYS like this...






Saturday, February 12, 2011

I'm a Package Deal

Wow. I don't know if it is something I'm feeding them, but my kids had another rough day. One of those "hide in the bathroom" days. Sometimes being 'Mom' is really hard. Sometimes... being 'Mom', 'Wife' and 'Me' is really hard. I firmly believe that each 'person' inside us has to feel fulfilled - which is, like, super difficult. They are all very different beings.
Let's look at each of these individually.

MOM - Most of the day, the Mom in me is in charge. Mom changes diapers, makes meals, cleans up the mess from the children, bathes them, clothes them and teaches them right from wrong. We have to keep our emotions in check even if the kids are driving us absolutely crazy.

 WIFE - About an hour before my husband is due home, I get into 'wife' mode. This means checking my make up, putting on underwear, and tidying up the living room. Serving him dinner, asking how his day was and telling him how much I missed him are the next steps. After the kids are in bed, we watch TV together and I will rub his feet (Hey, he returns the favour!). Seriously though - You know what the main 'Wife' duty is.

Ain't dat da truth.
 ME - This one tends to get neglected. It's very rare that I get to go out and do something that only requires me to think about me. I go grocery shopping alone, but that falls more into the Mom or Wife category. Sometimes I go and get the oil or tires changed; but again, that's more of a Wife thing. 
Once in a while, my husband pushes me out the door and makes me take care of this part of me. Don't feel selfish for wanting some you time! I absolutely love coming home to my husband and kids after a quiet hour by myself! Even if it's just an hour of driving around and window shopping, I feel like I've taken the time to think about myself and remember who I am.


I like looking at kittens, just sayin'


Some of you can add Employee and Student to that list too (or remove Wife and Mom). It doesn't matter what responsibilities you have in your life right now... Take some time to be you, because you are beautiful!
 

Friday, February 11, 2011

Can we talk for a minute?

Me, today.

I have absolutely no problem admitting that - every once in a while - I just can't handle the stress and have a little breakdown. I think more Moms need to openly talk about this!

I had serious PPD after my first son was born. I was barely 17, trying to raise a baby, have a relationship with my boyfriend that I still hardly knew, finish high school, keep up friendships, and live with my parents (Which I thought was terrible, of course). I loved my son, and was happy to be a Mom, but I didn't feel like I could connect with him. I was unable to breastfeed, which not only caused me to feel even less connected with him, but made people believe that I wasn't a good Mother - which they had been telling me since the moment they knew I was pregnant. I felt like all I could do is fail.

Once in a while, that feeling will come back. My almost 2 year old daughter decided to decorate the dining room in her lunch today, and - of course - my vacuum is broken. I picked my son up from school today and noticed that he had blown out the knee in yet another pair of jeans - Money is scarce around these parts, at the moment. On top of that, he failed his spelling test - the words we've been working on all week. On the way home from school, my almost 3 year old fell asleep - This means I have to wake him up to get him into the house. Unlike the movies, my kids wake up when I unbuckle them and skid across the ice rink that is my driveway to get into the house. My daughter is exhausted, so I throw her - not literally - in bed and run back downstairs before - 

Saddest.Face.Ever.


Nope, the boys are fighting already. Damn. Do some dishes, make snack, clean up mess, figure out dinner, make dinner, feed kids, clean up after kids, change diapers, get in pajamas, colour with kids, break up kids fighting over paper/crayons, deal with screeching little girl... and suddenly... 


 I lose it, and sit in my chair with my head in my hands - and that's okay. So many people ask me, "How do you do it? Three kids? I'm tired with just one!" (By the way, one kid is tough! Don't ever knock yourself for 'only' having one child!!) I love to respond by saying "I don't!" 
That's because I don't do it; my husband and I do - and my Mother and Step-Father in law,  and brother-in-law. Even my parents help, and they live 8 hours away. I am not raising my kids alone! I have friends with kids, I watch educational shows, I read EVERYTHING! You can never know everything about parenting; it's just not possible! 
If you're feeling upset, take a moment for yourself. Step outside and take some deep breaths (Or puff on a cigarette, if that's your thing), or go into the bathroom and talk calmly to yourself in the mirror. This is especially important to Moms with a newborn. It is absolutely reasonable to put your crying baby in their crib, and leave the room for a couple of minutes to collect yourself. Don't beat yourself up for losing control and starting to cry, just remember to pick yourself back up and be strong for your baby!


Here is a link to a PPD support site. Don't be embarrassed to talk to your doctor about it either. I know that some people may feel like a 'bad Mom' for admitting that they are depressed, but you're being a great Mom by fixing the problem so you can be at the top of your momming game! 

Thursday, February 10, 2011

Snowballs

Wow. I just made one of the tastiest, healthiest and easiest snacks in the history of snackdom!

My oldest son can't wait until we finish dinner and have 'dessert'. Sometimes it's simple like jello or ice cream, but sometimes - just sometimes - I manage to impress him.
Normally, I plan dessert halfway through the day. I'll make some cookies or a banana loaf after lunch - That sort of thing.

My kids were absolute monsters today. Monsters. Needless to say, a nice present for them was the last thing on my mind this afternoon. Dinner (BBQ chicken quesadillas!) was a huge hit, but not enough to make Owen forget about 'dessert'.

I really wanted to give the kids something fast as I was (and still am) a little grumpy and not really in the mood for a big production, but I also wanted something that was healthy and filling.
Then it hit me. Weelicious!

This website has changed the way I feed my children, and myself! Recipes ranging from one or two ingredient purees for babies, to full meals for the family, this is one of the only recipe sites I ever use.
Catherine is not only an amazing chef, but a Mother of two young children - Who would know better than her!? Understanding allergies, she will give options to make things gluten-free, peanut free, or dairy-free! She's amazing!

The recipe that I used is for Snow Balls, and they are amazing! Packed full of protein, and really good for you! I took a picture too!

I love my 60's plate

 In the comments section on Weelicious, people mentioned subbing in cocoa instead of coconut (Not everyone is a fan), or even mushed up cereal like cornflakes! Try it out! Easy and yummy!!
 

Wednesday, February 9, 2011

OMGIPULLEDOUTMYSONSTOOTH!

VICTORY!!

After attempting the old 'tie the tooth to a door and slam it' method (Which failed miserably), I managed to rip that sucker out!! SO EXCITED!

It's soooo teeny!
Wooooo!!
 

Baby, It's Cold Outside

I'm not sure where you are, but it's pretty darn cold in Canada. Ice cream is usually the favorite "dessert" in this house, but I love freshly baked goodies while I see the snow falling outside - Also, it just makes more sense to eat something warm.

Here's a simple recipe for simply yummy banana bread! 

Preheat oven to 350F

1 c sugar
1/3 c butter or 1/4 c oil
2 eggs
1 tsp vanilla
2 very ripe bananas (Very ripe means brown, quite brown)
1 1/4 c flour
1 tsp baking soda

Cream first three ingredients. Add vanilla and bananas. Mix well, it will be a bit lumpy.
Add flour and baking soda, mix well.
Pour mixture into greased loaf pan and cook for 1 hour.


You can also add chocolate chips or nuts, or both! 1/2 c should do it!
Also, to cut down on sugar, use 1/2 c of sugar and 1/2 c of unsweetened apple sauce!

Bending the Rules

I have certain time limits for different 'milestones' in the lives of my children.

'Solid foods' - 5 months
Bottle to sippy cup - 1 year
Out of crib, into toddler bed - 13 months
Sippy cup gone, normal cup used - 2-3 years
Potty trained - 3 years MAX

Not bad, right?

The thing is that I've found with each child, that limit gets pushed back - ever so slightly.
My oldest son was in a toddler the bed the minute he could crawl himself in and out of it. I don't even think he was walking yet, to be honest.

Yup, barely made it.
I followed my time limits perfectly - Yes, I had them set out before he was born. He was an amazing child. Good listener, very happy, good sleeper... Everything. I was truly lucky.

... And that is why Mother Nature is cruel. It's true! Ladies, seriously, you must agree with me. Ever notice how similar the symptoms are of both menstruation and pregnancy? Who would do that???
She also likes to give you an angelic child and make you believe that all your children will be like that because of your amazing genes. Ha.


Along comes my second. I must admit, he fooled me too. At 6 weeks, he was sleeping for 12 hours a night - and having two 3 hour naps during the day. I hardly saw him! 
And one day, he turned 2. All hell broke loose. He hits, slaps, bites, throws, screams... -sigh-

You should have seen the other kid.


Let's go to the time limit list.

'Solid foods' - 3 months (He was a hungry child)
Bottle to sippy cup - 14 months
Out of crib, into toddler bed - 14 months
Sippy cup gone, normal cup used - 2 months before his 3rd birthday
Potty trained - .... Uh, still working on that.


Okay, not too bad. Early with the food, but pushed back the bottle/sippy cup thing. Don't even get me started on the potty training. Moving forward!


My little girl! My angel!

'Solid foods' - About 5 months
Bottle to sippy cup - 1 year
Out of crib, into toddler bed - ... Still working on that. Aiming for her 2nd birthday...
Sippy cup gone, normal cup used - N/A
Potty trained - Will probably happen before her older brother, I'm sure


Food and bottle/sippy cup was normal.... but I'm having a really hard time getting her into a toddler bed. I think about it, I plan it... but it never seems to happen.

I think that I just know this is my last 'baby'... and I'm trying to keep her a 'baby' for as long as possible. 
Is that wrong? Maybe. 
Will I stop? Not bloody likely.

Tuesday, February 8, 2011

Feeling down?

I'd like to give a shout out to some websites that never fail to make me smile when I'm feeling down! Don't waste time being sad and morose - You are all beautiful, especially when you're smiling!

Parents Shouldn't Text 
Damn You AutoCorrect!
Baby LOL's and Awww's!

-insert witty title here-

Valentine's Day is right around the corner!
I'm on the fence about this holiday, though. Being a married woman, I always have someone to spend it with, so I don't hate it. On the other hand, after having 4 Valentine's Days with the same man, it sort of loses it's novelty. -shrugs- (I mean, I love you, sweetie!)
I'm a sucker though. I love mushy cards, chocolates and heart-shaped pizzas. I like "I love you"s, hugs, kisses and warm fuzzy feelings.

omgiloveyousomuchpun.com

 My oldest son is in Grade 1, and needs to give Valentine's to every child in his class. Every single child. No one gets left out.
Gee, thanks. That would have been awesome back when I was in the first grade. I was always forced to give them to all of the kids - even the gross one that would pick his nose and eat it. I am not even kidding.
Being the awesome Mom that I am, I found super cool Valentine's. No, they don't have Pixar or Disney characters on them. They're frickin' scratch n' sniff. Heck yes!


I've been trying really hard to be super cool in my son's eyes. It started with him asking me if I can just walk beside him, but not hold his hand when I was taking him to his classroom.
Then I was asked to just drop him off.
Then I was asked to just drop him off - and not open and shut the van door so no one sees me. Ouch.

Anyhoo, the Valentine's were cute, and Owen liked them. Well, he liked them until he heard what was actually written on some of the cards.
"Be mine"?
"You're Berry Cute"??

"BE MY SWEETIE"???!!?!?!
"Mom, this stuff is just too serious. I'm going to wait to give those to my girlfriend, when I'm older and I have one. Like, 17 or 18 years old, I think." - Owen
Convincing him to use the "Be mine" was easy. I told him it really meant "Be my friend" and he was totally okay with that.
The "Berry Cute" one was a little tougher. I told him that it makes Mommy feel happy when he tells her that she's pretty, and that's what he's doing for these girls. I explained that it's nice to give girls compliments. He was totally suspicious, and asked me if I was absolutely sure that they wouldn't think that he was 'flirting' with them.  He didn't want to 'give them the wrong idea". Seriously, I couldn't make this stuff up.


Hopefully he gets his act together when he's older. I want grandbabies.

Monday, February 7, 2011

Just stopping by...

Things I did today:

Laundry (Wash, dry, put away, 6 loads)
Dishes (5 loads)
Meal preparation (3 times)
Diaper changes
Ate a whole bunch of chocolate
Snow shoveling
Prepared a lunch for tomorrow
Taking out garbage
Driving people to and from work/school
Eating (A little)
Picked out kids clothes for tomorrow
Organized specific areas
Cleaning
Applied for jobs
Thought about running away for a week

Things I didn't do today:

Stop
Poop (I'm not kidding... I wish I was)




Anyway, I'm not done yet, so I have to go. Sorry!

Saturday, February 5, 2011

Meal time!

Being a Mom of young children, I don't have a whole lot of time to make fancy, healthy meals that require long and intense preparation. Also, I'm poor.

Pretty much it.

I have many friends that are either Moms or students (Which, financially speaking, are pretty much the same), and I know that it's important for both of them to eat properly, but not feel like it has to be a big production.
This recipe is super simple, uses things that you usually have on hand and is easy to pair with a side.


Stuffed Chicken Breasts

Preheat oven to 350F

5-6 chicken breasts
1 cup stuffing
1 can cream of chicken soup
pepper or paprika to taste
Wooden toothpicks

Make stuffing. Honestly, if you're as poor as lazy as I am, you get the StoveTop yumminess. It takes two seconds, and it's cheap as hell.
Butterfly chicken breasts (See here), and put about two spoonfuls of stuffing on top of each breast. Roll up breasts, and pin together with toothpicks.
Place them on a baking sheet with tin foil (For easy clean up!), and cover with cream of chicken soup. Don't be wimp - Use your hand to scoop that soup out and coat the top of the breasts. Cover with a little pepper or paprika.
Bake for one hour.

If you have a little bit more time, cut up a small onion and fry it in a little butter (or margarine, because you're poor) until translucent and add it to the stuffing before putting it on the breasts. Make sure you fluff the stuffing and coat it in the butter/onion mixture evenly.
Now because stuffing is usually a side, you can probably just get away with some corn or peas on the side of this dish. I prefer making some mashed potatoes, just sayin'.

Uterme, Uteryou, Uterus.

As I've previously stated, I have three children, and I absolutely love it. I always knew that I would become a Mom one day, and I enjoy it just as much as I thought I would - if not more!!

On the other hand, I don't want any more children.

Don't get me wrong, I just... don't want anymore. I'm done, and that's okay. I mean done
I'm going to put a picture of the end result of a hysterectomy now, sorry.

 

THIS is how done I am.
 Now here's the catch!
There are 3 things that surgeons are looking for in a woman that wants to get her tubes tied (Tubal ligation for you nursey people).
  1. Martial Status. You gotta be serious. You better be with the man of your freakin' dreams
  2. Age. Basically, they don't want some 18 year old coming in saying, "Like, I figured... If you, like, just tie me up, then I won't, like, have a baby and stuff. I'm totally not ready."
  3.  Previous births. Were they easy? Was baby healthy? Were there any health issues: High blood pressure, problems with delivery, blah blah blah.


 So, let's look at me.
  1. Marital status - Married, 4 years in March. Check.
  2. Age - 24 (This year), a little on the young side, but I already have 3 children.
  3. Previous births - With the exception of high blood pressure with my first, I've been pretty darn healthy. I mean, I'm a little chubby, but you can't hate me for that!
All in all, it looks pretty good, right? Wrong.
I was asked, "What if your husband dies, and you meet someone new? What if this new man wants children with you?"
Seriously? First of all, if my husband dies tomorrow, it's not like I'll remarry right away. Let's say he does. I give myself about 2 years for grieving (As much as he pisses me off, I'd miss the hell out of him). I'm now 26. I meet a man; I want to date for at least 2 years. I'm now 28, and have an 11 year old, 8 year old and 7 year old. All three kids are in school, and my days are open for work and/or school. Do I wanna mess that up by having a newborn? NO!


Second, and most disturbing question:
"What if one of your other children dies?"
... I'm sorry, what? I must have missed your point. Are you trying to tell me that children are replaceable?

No one will ever notice!
 I've been pregnancy-free for almost 2 years now; a combination of birth control, condoms, and telling my husband to keep his damn dirty hands off of me.

If I get pregnant, I'm making that doctor pay me child support.